Every once in a while.

Look I’m sorry.
I’m sorry for everything.
I’m sorry for not being quite as fast or quite as strong as the man you deserve.
I’m sorry my mind is such a mess all the time and I have trouble staying right here, right now, almost always.
I’m sorry I’m such a sine wave when it so comes to feelings and I’m sorry that your corners and mine are so separated from each other that it feels like there’s an asymptote between them.
I’m sorry I’m not around when you want someone to talk to and I’m sorry that means you sometimes don’t think of me as someone who will always be there.
I’m sorry you’re far away and I’m over here and mostly we just flutter around the same radius.
I’m sorry I’m impulsive and dumb and blind and deaf and oh so very taken.
I’m sorry for the sun as I am sorry for the wind and the little forest remnants that brush against your face every once in a while stretching in their microscopic timelines the moment so that they, in their own special way, can live touching you forever.
I’m sorry I don’t touch you enough.
I’m sorry we don’t talk enough.
I’m sorry we didn’t meet at the time we were supposed to meet and I’m sorry that clocks go so very slow and I’m sorry that clocks exist.
I’m sorry my eyes avert yours when you look at me with the force of a thousand comets and I feel like the defendant on a case that can’t possibly be won and I’ll get the life sentence for sure.
I’m sorry I’m such a lousy lawyer.
I’m sorry I can’t possibly defend you all the time even though I’m more than sure that you’re as strong as a thousand hurricanes and a million drops of rain all at once.
I’m sorry I’m so small.
I’m sorry I’m so young.
I’m sorry I can’t see the future as I am sorry that most times I can’t see the past and I’m doomed to run on a gramophone; jumping the needle and skipping tracks.
I’m sorry big parties make me sick.
I’m sorry I looked at you.
I’m sorry i stare both at you and at you and me and at any combination of you with almost anything else.
I’m sorry days break and nights fall as I am sorry that fire flies, phones booth and dinner rolls.
I’m sorry I can’t teleport.
I’m sorry I can’t drive boats or planes or horses or spaceships and dock them right next to your house holding a bouquet of whatever you want.
I’m sorry I don’t know what you want.
I’m sorry I’m getting old fast as I’m sorry I’m going to die too soon and I’m sorry we have lived for so long.
For so very long.
Look I’m sorry.


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