It is my understanding that we’re all knee-deep in problems. Since i like to pretend I’m a writer, I try to be smarter than everyone else and come up with a solution. I haven’t yet, but I’m making very good progress. For example, the root of the problem seems to lie in the fact that no one actually knows what they want.
One of my ex-girlfriends used to scold me for my lack of respect for social rules. I used to tell her that I did not care for a bunch of guidelines for correct social behavior, when they were obviously stopping everyone from realizing their true potential. We don’t know what we want, but even if we did, social norms would greatly limit what we would do to get it. Social norms are present in everything we do daily including, but not limited to, the way we eat, the way we look, the way we act and the way we speak. Most people argue that if we were completely devoid of social norms, society would simply be chaos, and I agree, but there are certainly a couple of them I can choose to ignore for the time being.
So, even if I had found a girl I was truly interested in, I would have to comply with society and follow a long set of steps to get her to date me. Everyone I know thinks it’s too straight-forward to directly ask someone out on a date when you don’t even know them. This may be the social rule I hold in contempt the most. Society is used to waiting, to playing it safe. We reject those who appear to function outside the norm. We are so comfortable in out tiny, secure world that we refuse to open our eyes. I’m sick and tired of waiting.
This is the root of the problem. We don’t know what we want, but even if we did, we would be too busy hiding from everything to do something about it. want desperately to go against the current. I want to be honest with everyone and express my feelings directly as often as I can. Once I have ignored social norms completely, all I have to conquer is the fear. Once I conquer the fear, i’ll have nothing standing between me and what I really want, if I find out what that is.
My fear and lack of self-confidence may be originated by the fact that I’m not handsome or attractive. Being attractive sends your chances of being accepted by society the way you are really high. You can ask people out without following the usual steps because you’re good looking and people appreciate your company just to look at you. You could be the biggest asshole in the entire world and people would still have conversations with you on a daily basis. Now, please don’t get me wrong, I don’t really want to be handsome or attractive. I like the way I look, and I like myself just the way i am. I just think finding someone to watch a movie with would be much easier if i were handsome and had a dickload of money.