Dark Potassium Surge

Life is filled with hardships, both enormous and insignificant, but the way you deal with these hardships determines who you are. Happy moments will come if you wait, but these hardly make a difference on what you become after a few years.

If there is one thing animated movies have taught me, it’s to follow my dreams. It sounds childish, but I laugh less each time I say it. I want to succeed. I want to get out there and prove to people that I’m not just another guy with a pen and a camera. I am Nikolas Murdock, and I make awesome stuff.

All I know right now is that God, Buddha, Tao or whoever is out there wants me to be a writer and a filmmaker, and that’s what I plan to do. Often people fall behind trying to follow the plan society dictates for them, but why do it if you’re not even sure there is such a thing as “Society”? You may wake up every day and wonder if everything is just a very long dream and your mind is actually creating everything. Unless there is something specific you want to achieve, there will be no reason for you to get up in the morning.

People like me who want to be part of the entertainment industry have one goal in mind; to be recognized and praised by others. Without an audience we are useless, and quite often we create separate characters for these situations. We may be sarcastic, utterly annoying bastards when we are alone, but in front of an audience we are the funniest, most creative people around. This may cause conflict to some, but to others it is simply our lifestyle. If you can be liked by others by doing the thing you do best, and love to do, then you succeed at life.

Respecting love we need the same thing. We need someone to develop an interest for us. We want to be recognized and loved by everyone, but we really want to be loved by someone in particular. In achieving that love we achieve everything we want, and it keeps us waking up in the mornings. Our loved one becomes our audience, and often it is the only audience we want to please. We want them to praise us and to recognize us and to show an interest in us. At the same time we want to be interested in them, to talk to them, to ask them questions. We are drawn to our loved ones.

I am not in the business of being sure of things. To be completely honest, I’m not sure of anything. The best I can do is guess, but by guessing I can get a little closer to the truth. By guessing I take chances. By guessing I often get rejected, but I only mind for a little while. By guessing we direct our lives to better places. Sometimes we fail, sometimes nothing happens, sometimes we win. By guessing we learn to accept failure as a way to the truth, and the truth fills us and binds us and makes us better. Whether that truth is a fact or an opinion, an answer or a question, depends on how you interpret it.

All i know right now is that God, Buddha, Tao or whoever is up there wants me to keep guessing and getting up in the mornings, and I will honor and respect that, because I can.


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